Hunting Attacks

One of my sisters suffers from what my family calls "hunting attacks." It's brought on by her husband going hunting for a few days and leaving her home with three kids. About halfway through the weekend, he's usually called home early to manage a home front crisis, much to the amusement of our man's man brother-in-law and the criticism of our well-meaning parents. Why can't she just let a man be a man?

After a week in Montana with my in-laws, I'm starting to get it. Although I didn't break out into a full "attack" of my own, I came close. It's not that I don't want D to play golf, fish, raft, and do all the things you do in the wilds of Montana (Grizzly bears and no DSL), it's just that I want to do those things too, which is complicated with Jr. in tow.

To D's credit, he's having his own mourning period of being able to do what he wants when he wants when in the manly state of Montana. Having a wife and child has cramped his style dramatically and he's taking it fairly well (and is leagues ahead of any man in my family). That being said, if I was the stand-by-your-man-woman my Idaho upbringing should have taught me to be, I have a sneaking suspicion that he'd be content to let the women and the children keep the home fires burning, while he goes after "the big one" (what man wouldn't?).

Although I already know this, I was reminded this week--again--that I AM NOT the mother or wife of previous generations and frankly, don't have many role models in that regard. My mom was a homemaker and although I’m starting to fall into a similiar category, I think it means something very different today and is still being defined. And, sometimes I wish that I didn’t’ have to be the one to define--or defend it.